My heart belongs to my husband, but Edward Cullen can have my neck!

Monday, July 7, 2008

Escape

Ahhhh! I figured out part of what the addiction is. It is the escape from MY reality. It is to get out of my soap opera and to focus on fantasy.... The stuff dreams are made of... I find myself desperately longing for that escape! I guess I am going to have to break down and read The Host. (Wow! Didn't even take my therapists to point that out. Figured it all out on my own. LOL!)

Now if I could just get to the point of transitioning that to being of service to others like I am supposed to... To get out of myself and focus on others.... Some times it is just so hard... Feeling so empty and like there is nothing left to give... Or nothing to refill myself... My doing, I suppose. Guess I am needing to recognize that maybe in doing for others that it might refill my need? Dunno. Some things to think about. Also need to recognize where I am putting that service... Is it in areas that will leave me drained and empty because of the giving never being enough? Where is it that I need to be of service? What would the Saviour have me do?
Posted by at

No comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)

Waiting!

Hatchlings

"I'll keep my guns, freedom, and money. You can keep the change!"

"I'll keep my guns, freedom, and money. You can keep the change!"
Vote Sarah Palin for President in 2012

Free-IQTest.net

IQ Test
Free-IQTest.net - IQ Test

Disclaimers

Disclaimer #1

Some of my views and feelings expressed are due to having dealt with some very challenging relationships lately. Namely, having had 2 foster daughters for the past 3 years and having loved them and wanting so badly to make a positive difference in their lives.

After realizing that I have done all that I can do and admitting that it is time to "let them go", there is a measure of hurt and bitterness that I am working through. I need time to heal and to figure out how to deal with the feelings and emotions that I am left with.

Some of my posts are not going to be very uplifting and some will be down right uncomfortable to read. I recognize how difficult it is to be a part of peoples lives who struggle with depression. It is exhausting and not something that "refills ones cup."

My intentions in blogging are not to bring anyone down or suck them into my, sometimes depressing thoughts. I am not looking for a pity party or for people to suck dry.

For this new chapter in my life, I need to work on me and my family and strengthening who we are as individuals and a family unit. And most importantly, building our relationship with our Heavenly Father. I want to be a better person.

I hope that by being able to reflect on my feelings in blogging, I can heal and maybe somehow help someone else who has been through similar challenges/experiences to move forward and overcome their trials. I also recognize that in this, there may be others who have had experiences that can be shared with me to give me hope and encouragement. - I welcome your comments either way.


Disclaimer #2

If you have not read any or some of the Twilight series books and have a desire to and don't want to spoil anything, you might want to use caution in reading some of my posts that look like they are related to my feelings on the books.

I don't intend to spoil any of that reading experience for anyone. It has been a wonderful fantasy world and escape for me - a HUGE blessing for me to be able to think on these fictional people so that I could function "through the motions" of my life.

FYI!

Squirty Wart is a nick name my father gave me when I was little. I always hated it. In looking to protect myself and family from online preditors, it has become a very convenient name for me to use and it has actually grown on me. ;)