Celebrating My Grandpa's Life

I am fighting very conflicting emotions right now as I am trying to understand what I am feeling with the passing of my Grandpa. Grandpa has always been there. I have always known that he loves me and have never doubted that. It is just so hard to accept that he is not there to stop in and see anytime.

As I was told that Grandpa only had days, I felt peace, but was also so sad. I wanted to go to him, but also feared the hurt I would feel from seeing him so vulnerable. Grandpa has always been so strong and has always literally crushed me with his hugs. I don't think he realized his strength, but I wouldn't trade those hugs for anything.

I think about the sound of his voice and can hear and picture him in my heart. I can hear his deep laugh that comes from his toes. And how his eyes tear up when it is the first time he has seen me in a long time. I know that he knows how much I love him.

Grandpa is such a great man. He loves all of his family so much. He is so giving and caring to everyone. I can't think of him in the past tense, because I know his spirit is still alive. I have no doubt that he and Grandma are having a joyous reunion as well as all his siblings that he put so much effort into making sure their temple work was done before he would decide it was OK for him to leave this life.

There is a song that I have been listening to that has always reminded me of Grandpa. And it describes pretty accurately how I feel about Grandpa. It is called, "He's A Hero" by SheDaisy. Here are the Lyrics.

"He's A Hero"

He's a young man
In his golden years
His hair of black now quickly fades to gray
The limp as he walks is his only souvenir
From those purple-hearted war time days

But you don't hear him complain
No matter how the fall
I don't have a lot, he'd smile and say
But lord I have it all

He's a hero
In my mother's eyes
He taught her how to raise me right
and never compromise

He always says he has the
finer things in life
Somewhere to live, someone to love
and the Good book to live by

Some say his heart is big
All though his fortune's small
I don't have a lot, he'd smile and say
But lord I have it all

A rembrandt in his own right
A master at his craft
Creating something beautiful
A memory that will last
And always last

He's the constant
In our family
Beginning this long line of love
We've cared

And even when he's gone he'll watch over me
When I close my eyes at night I feel him there

Wear my name, well my child
Be true and stand tall
You don't have a lot he'd always say
But lord you have it all

You don't have a lot he'd always say
But thank the Lord you have it all

Hero in my mother's eyes

I love you, Grandpa! I miss you! I do have it all. Thank you for the legacy you have left for your posterity!

What I Am Thankful For

I am thankful for...

my family far and near.
friends and neighbors who are so thoughtful of me and my family.
a home to live in and enjoy.
new opportunities to learn and grow.
a means to help support my family.
this free land.
the plan of salvation.
pain that helps me to learn. ;)
a husband who is my best friend and who will challenge me and help me to become stronger.
a son who has a desire to do what is right and is the light of my life.

Remembering...

Thanks to my sister-in-law and the fact that I am collecting some pictures for my mother-in-laws birthday present, I am having some flash back moments...

The little man has grown so much!

Twilight...

I am sooo bumbed. Because of all the things going on in my life right now and all the responsibilities that I have as an adult, I will not be seeing Twilight until next week some time. I am so disappointed.

So, all you people who have already seen it, I am happy for you!

I will definitely be seeing it with my hubby. I was going to go tomorrow afternoon with The Man Who Has My Heart and his aunt and uncle and some other friends... Instead, I will be cleaning and preparing for many things going on in my life next week. After Tuesday, it will be much different. Maybe Wednesday while The Little Man is at school, we can go see it. Time will tell. Of course, there is Thanksgiving day, but the The Little Man would have to go with us and I am not sure how he would feel about seeing Twilight or if it is even appropriate for him at the age of 8.

I heard some mixed reviews about the movie, so far. Some who loved it and others who thought it was stupid... I hope I will enjoy it.

The morning radio show that I listen to, 94.1 KMPS, have been talking about the movie and the books all week. They had a ride up to Forks, WA where Ichabod Caine lived as a child. This morning they interviewed Forks Mayor, Nedra Reed. That was kind of cool.

I find it amusing that no one will actually be watching Twilight in theatres in Forks, because, there is no theatre in Forks. Twilight has been good for their economy, though. The locals have really embraced the whole fan base.

Anyway, until I see the movie, I will just have to continue to look forward to seeing it with anticipation.

There's Snow in Those Mountains!

Yep. Fall is here! Winter is coming!

This Man Really Scares Me

http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2008/oct/31/washington-times-kicked-obama-plane-finale/

I pray Obama does not win the election. I really think he is a sick man. Reading things like this about him sends all kinds of red flags up with me. Corupt. Corupt. Corupt!!! Something to hide. Doesn't want any real digging by anyone who doesn't support him... As much as I dislike John Kerry, I think this Obama is far more evil....

Here's How I See It...

OK, I guess I am in one of those phases of being completely stuck on something I can't let go of. Call it OCD, call it whatever you like. Thing is, it is something that bothers me.

OK, I am LDS. I have not done or said anything to lead anyone to believe contrary to that and I am not about to start. I fully embrace the Gospel and have been blessed immensely for it. I have friends and acquaintances that believe very differently than I do. I still love them and I still want them to be happy. I am not wishing for anything bad for them because they do not believe the same way I do. I am not even going to condemn them for not believing the same as me.

Here is what I am thinking... I have been taught and I believe that drinking alcohol is morally wrong. Yet, it is legal to drink at the age of 21. I still have my right to believe it is morally wrong and am not condemned for it. And I am not out there in people's faces at the bars telling them that they are sinners...

So, in m opinion, when it comes to homosexual "marriage" being legalized? Some of the overactive, overbearing "activists" screwed it up for all of us, both homosexuals and heterosexuals.

From what I understand, homosexuals want legal rights; protection for themselves and their partners from persecution and able to "live their lifestyle in peace." Am I wrong?

Here is how I see it; if it had not been jammed down every one's throats and forced into our homes and schools, they could have had what they wanted. You don't see them teaching youth at any age in schools that they should consume alcohol. Yet, it is legal at the age of 21. And there are even those who would persuade the youth NOT to drink and tell them they will regret it... Their free agency still allows them to do it if done responsibly.

Doctors are still aloud to tell their patients that it is wrong or even refer them to other doctors or refuse to see them if they are not following what is recommended. They are not forced to treat them. And, if a doctor is not willing to treat me because of my beliefs, I don't want them to treat me! I will look for another doctor. I prefer to have those around me who are looking out for my well being to be on the same page as me.

Anyway, that is my take on all of it. The reason they are getting so much opostion is because of the actions of some who took things WAY too far. I have the right to protect my son from influences and teachings contrary to my beliefs. I will still teach him that it is wrong, just as I will teach him that drinking, drugs, sex before marriage, etc is wrong. And I will still continue to also teach him that those who do not believe the same as us are still good people and worthy of love. I still love and care about the people in my life who do not believe as I do.

OK, maybe I can let go of this, now.

Is This Nation Really Coming to This?

Wow... This is REALLY unsettling.

"Democratic strategists and advocates for black voters say they understand officers wanting to keep the peace, but caution that excessive police presence could intimidate voters."

Intimidate, how???? To keep the peace? That's a bad thing?

I am not racist against blacks. This comment is just stupid and makes blacks look bad. Are these strategists trying to imply that a police presence would intimidate voters to vote differently than they want to? Or not to vote at all? If they aren't doing anything wrong, what do they have to fear by a police presence? Or am I just naive? Is there something I am missing?

How Does It Effect Me?

Let me tell you how same sex marriage effects me directly. I am loosing my rights to believe that homosexuality is morally wrong.



Yes, it is my business... My religious rights and freedoms are in jeopardy.



From the Churches web site...
"The focus of the Church’s involvement is specifically same-sex marriage and its consequences. The Church does not object to rights (already established in California) regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights, so long as these do not infringe on the integrity of the family or the constitutional rights of churches and their adherents to administer and practice their religion free from government interference. "

When Gay Rights and Religious Liberties Clash Where are MY rights?

So, anyone who tells me it is none of my business, is wrong.

This is not OK with me.

God's Way

With all that is going on in the world right now, there are so many pulls in so many different directions. There are people who are getting in each others faces over issues they feel strongly about. There is contention and anger.

Living in a very liberal state, I get attacks on my beliefs quite often. Everyone at work knows that I am LDS. They have asked what I believe and I have told them. I have shown that I live what I believe.

Many times conversation will turn heated. When it gets to that point, I leave the situation. Sometimes this makes my co-workers more upset because they can not sway me to their views. I have more recently taken to putting on my MP3 player and playing Conference talks to stay out of the whole drama.

My blog here I feel is a safe place for me to be free from those unwanted attacks on my beliefs and a place for me to speak mine.

There are so many people I know that are so determined to continue to do things the worlds way. Regardless of circumstances, it is always what is "Politically Correct", what the media dictates or what is popular. I will admit that there have been quite a few times in my life that I have allowed myself to be influenced by all that. I have been there and I have been here. I know the difference. I have tried it the worlds way, and I have and am continuing to try it God's way.

God's way brings me much more peace within myself and joy that I never could have experienced otherwise. I have understood new things that I never imagined; both about myself and about life/existence in general. I am not damned as I was when I did things contrary to the Gospel. Damned being quite literally what happens when you put a damn to stop water... to slow the flow or "progression".

It is interesting the mentality I had before about being damned... thinking it was a torture of living in hell. Now I understand that it is being prevented from progression and eventually to become like God. Actually, I guess with what I know now, that if I were to go back to the world's way that it would be like living in hell... knowing and understanding what I had given up.

I am so grateful to have an understanding of God's eternal plan for me. To know that he loves all of his children. To know that he knows me.

I am grateful for the Savior and the sacrifice that he made in Gethsemane in suffering for my sins. He loves me and continues to be a mediator between me and my Heavenly Father. He understands all my pain because he suffered it. He died so that I can live again. He lived and showed me how to live by his example and teachings.

I am grateful for a living prophet. I know that he is a mouth piece for the Savior. I know that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is His only true and complete church here upon the earth. (Others may have partial truths, but not the fullness.)

I am grateful for parents on this Earth who never gave up on me and who continue to pray for me.

I am sad when I see things happening around the world and realize that people have their free-agency and they choose to do things that take them further from God.

Just to be clear as to what I believe...

I believe that marriage is between a man and a woman and that marriage is ordained of God. Anything else is not in keeping with his plan.

I believe in life and that it begins at conception. I believe that termination of a pregnancy is murder and against God.

Using excuses that God made them that way is a cop-out. We all came to this Earth knowing we would have challenges and we accepted them and wanted the opportunity to have a body and to progress. Yes, I do believe that there are individuals who struggle with same gender attraction, but I also believe that acting on it is wrong. Just as I believe that pre-marital sex is wrong in a heterosexual relationship.

We all have different challenges that we face and need to overcome. I definitely still have plenty of my own. But I will not use the excuse of "God made me that way" to stop me from overcoming my challenges.

I am severely overweight. If I use the excuse that "God made me that way" and do nothing to overcome it, it will kill me. I suffer from depression, but if I use the excuse that "God made me that way" and decide to stay in bed all day and not take care of myself and my family, nor clean my house nor go to my job... there will be undesired consequences for them as well. It is all about overcoming our challenges and working toward becoming better and making God a part of the solution not blaming him for making us that way.